Fran Lebowitz Quotes (51 quotations)

Index Page # 1 of 3 (Quotes : 1 - 25 )

1. All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable. - Fran Lebowitz

2. Andy Warhol made fame more famous. - Fran Lebowitz

3. As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you. - Fran Lebowitz

4. Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

5. Being a woman is of special interest to aspiring male transexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football. - Fran Lebowitz

6. Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat. - Fran Lebowitz

7. Children ask better questions than adults. "May I have a cookie?" "Why is the sky blue?" and "What does a cow say?" are far more likely to elicit a cheerful response than "Where's your manuscript?" Why haven't you called?" and "Who's your lawyer?" - Fran Lebowitz

8. Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add. - Fran Lebowitz

9. Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. - Fran Lebowitz

10. Favorite animal: steak. - Fran Lebowitz

11. Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

12. Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

13. Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications. - Fran Lebowitz

14. Humility is no substitute for a good personality. - Fran Lebowitz

15. I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere. - Fran Lebowitz

16. I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not. - Fran Lebowitz

17. I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult. - Fran Lebowitz

18. I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota. - Fran Lebowitz

19. I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word - politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit. - Fran Lebowitz

20. If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail. - Fran Lebowitz

21. If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words. - Fran Lebowitz

22. If you can stay in love for more than two years, you're on something. - Fran Lebowitz

23. If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be fantasies. - Fran Lebowitz

24. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra. - Fran Lebowitz

25. In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy. - Fran Lebowitz

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