Ogden Nash Quotes (30 quotations)

Index Page # 1 of 2 (Quotes : 1 - 25 )

1. A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

2. A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

3. A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick. - Ogden Nash

4. An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a man can hope for, / Even then, no sooner has he learned how to cope with the tick than she tocks. - Ogden Nash

5. Basketball, a game which won't be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus-high and return the giraffes to the zoo. - Ogden Nash

6. Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

7. Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money? - Ogden Nash

8. Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, And that's what parents were created for. - Ogden Nash

9. Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for. - Ogden Nash

10. Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you. - Ogden Nash

11. He without benefit of scruples His fun and money soon quadruples. - Ogden Nash

12. I drink because she nags, he said I nag because he drinks. But if the truth be known to you, He's a lush and she's a shrew. - Ogden Nash

13. I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash

14. I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance / Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance. - Ogden Nash

15. Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

16. Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else. - Ogden Nash

17. Nietsche is Pietsche. - Ogden Nash

18. Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore. - Ogden Nash

19. People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it. - Ogden Nash

20. People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up. - Ogden Nash

21. Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long. - Ogden Nash

22. Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as forward as hives or goiters, And where it is least desired, it loiters. - Ogden Nash

23. The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late. - Ogden Nash

24. The cow is of the bovine ilk;One end is moo, the other milk. - Ogden Nash

25. The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Supplies us sausage, ham, and Bacon. Let others say his heart is big, I think it stupid of the Pig. - Ogden Nash

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